How & Why I’ve Changed

If you looked at videos I filmed exactly one year from today, and compared them to now (the end of 2017 and the beginning of 2018) – I’m sure you could tell there is a drastic difference in my persona.

How?

Well, for starters, I was actually quite miserable in 2016.  HB and I had basically picked up, sold our house and moved across the country, leaving both of our families, all for the sake of HB’s fellowship. The friendships I’ve forged there will last a lifetime, don’t get me wrong, but we both really missed our families.

And Houston.

And Tex-Mex.

But mostly Tex-Mex.

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All jokes aside, though…my job was dramatically harder than anyone could have even anticipated–even my employer.

I had basically signed up for what amounted to a field-test position as an Anesthesiologist on-call  2/3rds of the year.  I lied to myself for a long time, but I was miserable.

However, in the latter half of the year, everything fell into place. Our months-long search for a house fell into our laps on the very last day possible (let me know if you want me to do a video on that doozy of a story). Hurricane Harvey hit us two weeks after we moved in, but we sustained little to no damage. Our baby girl was born just a few short months later. Lots of blessings.

To be completely honest, I never thought I would be the type of person saying this, but having my daughter has been the missing puzzle piece all along. I’m not what you would consider a particularly sappy person, but am instead the “secretly sentimental” type.  My whole life I’ve quite prided myself on being independent, never needing anyone or anything to make me as a person happy or defined or complete.

But.

Then I had Harper.

Then I had Harper.

A lot of you who watch my videos have mentioned that my happiness seems to have tripled lately, especially those of you who have been watching for many years. I think a lot of this is a combination of being done with the rigorous amount of training required to become an anesthesiologist, as well as finally getting to put down roots, having a child, starting our permanent positions. Everything has really just fallen into place these past few months, and I couldn’t be happier.

My next hurdle will be returning to work after ~3 months maternity leave, and figuring out my work-life balance as both a career Anesthesiologist and new mom.

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